Clarifying wellbeing
I have come to realise that wellbeing, even though it is a universally understood concept, is a term with diverse interpretations and meanings, each as unique as the individuals who contemplate it.
What do I mean by the term wellbeing?
And what do I think it involves?
It means to Be Well.
Pretty simple.
In the context where I am coming from, it is where there is a sense of being at peace with oneself, all aspects of one’s existence and having energy, vitality and that your needs are met in such a way that you are able to look after yourself.
On a spectrum from really ill to feeling fabulous, I think the minimum would be to have all aspects of wellbeing more or less on par. To have a baseline and general sense of being okay, with the direction of improving aspects which may lag behind, but be aware of them and have a plan to develop an integrated and balanced sense of wellbeing. There is our physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, relational, occupational and financial wellbeing to consider. So it is a very multifaceted topic but it need not be complicated, looking after all these aspects can be demystified and simplified. Simpler is ALWAYS better.
When I work with clients, one of the first things we will look at is the picture of your overall wellbeing. What is the state of your pillars at the given time we are assessing this? Our lives are dynamic and always in a state of flux or change so it’s more about the bigger picture. From knowing where you are, we can then assess where you want to be. Figuring out where you want to be, will give us a direction in which to set off on our journey. Then we can start to put plans in place to provide the means by which you can continue along their journey in such a way that each aspect of your wellbeing needs can be addressed, focused on and improved. If your basics aren’t in balance first, the foundations working for you - then any journey will be a challenge and success elusive.
Where you want to be vs what you do
The other thing I encounter a lot is that people want to be well. They love this concept of wellness and balance and calm but the choices they make each day take them in the opposite direction to where they want to be.
For the longest time, I would push myself to do “just one more thing” so that I could feel a bigger sense of accomplishment for the day. What this “just one more thing” meant in reality was that once that was done, I was out of time to go for a walk, get on my yoga mat for a practice or take some time to recover from the day before sorting out dinner. Which meant that I was compromising on my wellbeing and I wondered why I was always feeling tired, achy, sore and grumpy. My body was being neglected and my mind was being pushed too far.
Eventually, I realised that every decision I make that would prioritse or neglect myself and my health, would be a vote for or against a future version of me. Every time I chose to do that “one” more task, was a vote against me investing in my health. It’s easy to sit where you are, carry on and let time pass. But the cost of neglecting your health will always catch up to you. Whether it develops as that persistent sore neck, or that debilitating tension headache or even the relationships that get strained and distant from not paying attention to them.
You can choose a different path.
At any stage of your life, you can improve your wellbeing, no matter how exhausted, burnout or stressed you are today. You can change tomorrow by making small changes today.
Let’s dive a little deeper into wellbeing ideas and uncover what it looks like:
What wellbeing is:
Feeling good - about yourself, about your life
Having a solid baseline of physical and mental health
Being comfortable with a balance of challenge and peace in your life
Experiencing a level of overall happiness
Having a general sense of satisfaction or contentment
Being intrinsically motivated
Having clear boundaries
Functioning well in your day-to-day life
Responding well to challenges
Having the resilience to bounce back from setbacks
What wellbeing is NOT:
Feeling depleted
Feeling demotivated
Experiencing regular pain, illness or discomfort
Forcing yourself to be positive
Pushing on when you don’t have the energy
Being isolated or alone for too long
Neglecting your basic health and needs
Criticising and judging yourself harshly
Being extrinsically motivated
Always saying “yes”
We become what we practise - so what are you practising?
If you are someone who consistently has late nights and wakes up exhausted and on a deficit to see you through yet another busy, demanding day - the trajectory of that path can only lead to exhaustion and burnout.
If you have trouble sleeping because you are dealing with crises or work until you go to bed, your mind will be hooked into the busy-ness of what you were dealing with, will all the emotions and stress responses that arose - you haven’t given yourself the opportunity to clear the decks. The mind will be fully engaged in problem-solving, worrying, planning, and creating stories of possibilities for the future that will affect your chance of good, restorative rest.
If you wake up on the back foot, charge into the day, not fuelling yourself with a good breakfast, make sure you have time around meals to eat well, get all your nutrients in and give yourself the nourishment you need, you’ll likely land up, hungry, grumpy and ineffective at some point in the day.
These seem like such obvious and simple things to tackle to shift behaviour and improve wellbeing but they are often overlooked as the importance of the foundations of wellbeing are not clear to you and certainly not prioritised.
These are just a few examples of how, in today’s busy working world, we all hustle and get through our day, sometimes at any cost. We don’t prioritise ourselves as we have been swept away by stress, unhealthy habits and a lack of awareness BUT there is actually another way to live.
How does wellbeing apply here?
Well, when you start to learn and unravel, explore what wellbeing is and how it can look for you - opportunities and possibilities will arise that seemed hidden to you before. Instead of living each day on a deficit or borrowing energy from tomorrow - find ways that you can slow things down, prioritse the important things like rest, nourishment, movement and connection.
That’s where the beauty of Bija and a wellbeing guide can help. It’s not about big dramatic jumps and leaps from who you are and where you are today to something completely different tomorrow. It’s about having an awareness of what’s really going on with you today, defining an ideal or space you want to move to or person you want to become. The path becomes clear when there are small steps that are planned for you to keep heading in the direction you want to go. Having someone like a wellbeing guide, who keeps you on track, offers tools, information and support on a regular basis will help get you there. But ultimately, you are the one who needs to take the steps and make the changes in your life you need.
Get in touch with me and let’s embark on your journey to integrated wellbeing today.
